Wednesday, September 16, 2009
WOOHOO EIGHT DAYS TO PROMOS! (and what are you doing here stupid rachel tang) o.0 watching time slip by, yet no real sense of urgency.. HMMMM i don't know what i am thinking either :D
anw, i'm glad i chose that path... though it might bring me pain sometimes (HAHA!) but now i know, (and yes, i can feel) it's worth it... heartfelt thanks to those who stood by my decisions (and un-decisions lol!) and encouraged me to do wht my heart told me to. and thank YOU, for fixing the roller-coaster track, so the journey is now smoother and more pleasant :D (if you don't get what i mean, too bad!) don't worry and think too much, you really can do it. trust yourself!
ok it's time to do some serious mugging/practising piano... sigh. the realities of life never fails to get you down when you're up... HAHA. on a random thought... i suddenly miss you guys alot... haha. cos i chanced upon a DAS we did for camp last year (: takecare yea and goodluck for promos! :D
and yes, i love you too (:
rachel ♥
9:41 PM
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Saturday, September 12, 2009
不想懂得
当世界 不知不觉的变了
有时候 我怀念以前的我
作的梦 虽然远远的 想像是 一种快乐
拥有了 同时也失去什麽 而眷恋 原来会带来软弱
你让我在雾里成熟 心开始曲折
我不想舍得 不想懂得 是谁惹谁 言不由衷
说谎伤害 都是不安犯的错 怕抱不紧什麽
我不想舍得 不想懂得 谁说割爱 才更深刻
彼此依赖 是爱不是负荷 互相照顾就是 幸福的
我不想舍得 不想懂得 谁说割爱 才更深刻
彼此依赖 是爱不是负荷 能握着手就是 感动的
我愿意 一秒钟放弃全宇宙
挤在只有我们 紧靠的小星球
我多不舍得 多不懂得 谁说割爱 才更深刻
彼此依赖 是爱不是负荷 能握着手就是 感动的
i really cannot tell anymore, and i don't want to know.
rachel ♥
7:59 PM
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Thursday, September 10, 2009
sometimes, it just feels so right. but immediately after, things undergo a 180 degree change. from high to low, low to high. i really can't adapt to the emotional roller coaster. i try to rationalise my way thru it everytime, but some things are not meant to be rationalized? if not where do feelings stand? i don't know what to think anymore, and maybe i should just not think. tell me what you want me to do. please.
rachel ♥
9:45 PM
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Wednesday, September 9, 2009
i'm not supposed to be feeling like this. if i continue doing what i've been, i'll believe myself soon.
rachel ♥
11:39 PM
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Monday, September 7, 2009
i'd give anything to relive my life. hopefully i'd be born smarter, brighter, nicer, lovelier... the best would be to be born an exceptional prodigy, good in everything.
i hate myself. i really, really do.
rachel ♥
12:21 AM
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Saturday, September 5, 2009
i don't know what's wrong with me either. i don't know how i feel anymore. i don't understand myself. and i should stop deluding myself by watching dramas. what's the point of saying, when we can't do what we set out to? what's the point of feeling, when the only feelings you feel are negative? what's the point of knowing, when you know but can't do anything about it? i thought i didn't need anything, not you, not them, not anyone... but again, i have been proven wrong. we might be close in distance, but yet i feel even more distant. when i make up my mind to do something, i give my very best. really, i do. but somehow, my best is not enough. and what matters, no longer matters anymore. ultimately, in life things come and go. and when we leave, we leave with nothing either. it's a kind of unexplainable emptiness. i know i need to snap out of this, but i really have no more strength to. it hurts to pretend, but after awhile, habits form, and facades become comforable. such is life. try it once, try it twice, try it thrice... one fine day, what you never expected to happen, will somehow be ethced in your mind as the truth. which even if you are the only one in the world who believes it, at least you can try convincing yourself. which is an uphill task, because ultimately, you know you can't get past yourself. rt,ys.bt.
rachel ♥
6:58 PM
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